Control

Choosing to pray certain scriptures over my family has been a very interesting journey. The bible says that the word of God is living and active. Our lives have become living and active to a completely new level since I embarked on praying these scriptures out. One of the scriptures I have tried to pray daily comes from Colossians 1:9

We ask God to give you complete knowledge of his will and to give you spiritual wisdom and understanding.

Praying for God to reveal his will to us seemed like an obvious thing to do. What Christian would say they do not want to be in God’s will?

As I have watched God reveal pieces of his plan to us, I have realized that I have had a bit of an agenda with God. There have been things on my heart that weren’t necessarily on his heart for right now. As I’ve prayed for gifts, dreams and visions to be stirred up within Andrew, I think I was expecting that they would all be my dreams and visions.

This past week I have been on a learning curve of giving my agenda back to God. I’ve cried and felt frustrated as I’ve wrestled with God, trying to convince Him that I really do have a good plan. In the end He always seems to win in my life, and that I’m very thankful for.

Actually opening up your heart and asking God to change you can be a scary process. Maybe scarier for your spouse than for you! There have been days lately where I feel like I’m going backwards.

Our bedroom always seems to be the very last priority of things to clean around the house. As much as I long for the relaxed environment of a clean room, I find that the areas that other people see are the areas that I focus on first. Whenever I do finally clean our room, it often gets messier before it gets clean.

That’s how things are in my heart right now. There has been some deeply rooted “weeds” in my heart that the Lord is uprooting. Some days I feel like there are weeds laying all over, but soon they’ll be burned up.

A deep root within me is simply control of my life. This entire year seems to have been focused on that as God asked us to put our house up for sale, and then take it off the market, as our garage burned down, and other big life events. Things have been completely out of my control, and I’ve watched God come in and take over, performing some incredible miracles. Control is so far out of my hands. I know deep within me I want God’s will to be done more than my own, so I choose to stay committed to praying HIS word over my life, instead of my own words.

Lord, reveal your will to us. Give us spiritual wisdom and understand. Give us the patience and endurance we need. Allow us to produce fruit as we serve you. And can we know you better and fall more in love with you as we walk this path of life? (adapted from Colossians 1)

 

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One thought on “Control

  1. Pingback: Winds of Change «

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